Gottman’s ‘7 Principles for Making Marriage Work’
Who Are John and Julie Gottman?
John Gottman and Julie Gottman are renowned psychologists and researchers in the field of marriage and relationships. They are best known for their extensive work on predicting marital stability and divorce through the observation of couples' interactions. They developed the Gottman Method Couples Therapy, which is widely used by therapists to help couples strengthen their relationships and later founded The Gottman Institute. His work has resulted in numerous books, articles, and workshops aimed at improving marital satisfaction and stability, one of these is the groundbreaking “Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work,” which outlines key principles for building and maintaining a healthy and fulfilling marriage.
What are Gottman’s 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work?
Enhance Love Maps: This principle involves knowing your partner deeply - their likes, dislikes, fears, dreams, and everything in between. It's about continuously updating your understanding of each other as you grow and change.
Nurture Fondness and Admiration: Cultivating a deep sense of fondness and admiration for your partner is crucial. Gottman found that happy couples hold onto positive feelings for each other even during challenging times.
Turn Towards Each Other: Successful couples are attentive to each other's bids for attention, affection, and support. They consistently respond positively to each other's needs, which builds trust and connection.
Accept Influence: In healthy marriages, partners are willing to accept each other's perspectives and compromise. It's about respecting each other's opinions and working together as a team.
Solve Solvable Problems: Every relationship has its share of conflicts, but happy couples are skilled at addressing and resolving these issues in a constructive manner. They focus on specific problems and work collaboratively to find solutions.
Overcome Gridlock: Some issues may seem unsolvable, leading to what Gottman calls "gridlock." However, successful couples are able to navigate these impasses by understanding each other's underlying dreams, aspirations, and fears.
Create Shared Meaning: Finally, strong marriages are built on a foundation of shared values, rituals, and goals. Couples create a sense of purpose and meaning in their relationship by aligning their lives around common beliefs and aspirations.
These principles serve as a roadmap for couples to cultivate intimacy, trust and resilience in their marriages. One of Gottman’s studies (Babcock, Gottman, Ryan & Gottman, 2013) has shown that this workshop improved couples’ friendship and the quality of sex, romance, and passion in their relationship and helped couples have less destructive and more constructive conflict discussions.
Schedule and Cost
This 12-hour weekend retreat includes lectures, demonstrations, videos and private couples exercises, based on the internationally acclaimed relationship research of Dr. John Gottman. In addition to the training, participants receive the Seven Principles Workbook Kit.
Each Retreat is a two-day commitment, Saturday and Sunday from 9am to 3pm.
Light Refreshments will be provided both days.
These workshops will be held at our Medina location, Avenues of Counseling and Mediation, LLC. The address is 230 S Court Street, Medina 44256.
